Tag Archives: Juicy K. Tore

Skater of the Month: MisTits

MisTits and Juicy K. Tore prepare to rock

I confess that I have probably voted for MisTits as SOTM more than any other skater on SVRG. All it takes is going up against her one-on-one in any blocking situation to know how fearsome she is. After every bout I am reminded of the grace and fortitude of her execution as she darts around the track, laying out opponents right and left with the efficiency of a professional assassin. I’ve seen jammers catch more air than Michael Jordan after Tits has picked one off with a killer hit. The reason why Tits is such an amazing blocker, though, is that in addition to all that raw power, she is incredibly agile on her skates. That combination should give any opponent a sinking feeling when they see her lining up.


How did you find out about roller derby?
I was looking up fight moves to use in my next fight. I came across a video of two girls skating as fast as they can. One girl suddenly turns and knocks the other girl off her feet and into the air. The crowd went crazy. I had found my next fight move…and it was legal!

 

What kind of skating skills or athletic abilities did you have before starting derby?
The first rule of Fight Club is you don’t talk about Fight Club.

 

How did you derive your derby name?
I’m a big Misfits fan…and I love my chesticles!

 

What is your signature move?
Knocking down yo’ jammer.

 

What is your greatest strength as a skater?
I am always pushing myself and encouraging others to improve.

 

What has been your greatest experience on the rink?
Learning how to skate. When I started I didn’t even know how to skate. I was using my little sister’s skates that our mom bought for a dollar at a yard sale!

 

I hear your little sister is a derby girl in the making.
Everybody better watch out when she hits the track–I’ve been teaching her how to block and skate fast. She’s training to be SVRG’s MVP in 2015.

 

What is your worst injury, and how did you earn it?
I don’t get bruises, I give them!

 

Which teammates do you work well with?
The skate wheels:  Juicy, Feisty, Skooter, and me. Four wheels make a skate!

 

What are you looking forward to the most this season?
Getting first place at the jello wrestling match…again!

 

What do you contribute to SVRG *off* the track?
During SVRG’s early years I made many flyers and graphics.

 

If you’re not on the rink, where would we find you?
You can find me at a skate park. Roosevelt, Cunningham, or Cabrio, but my home away from home is Sunnyvale Skate Park.

 

What’s the one piece of advice you would give women interested in playing roller derby?
Push yourself till you think you can’t go on, and then push yourself a little more.

 

Yes, jammers, you should be plenty afraid. Photo credit: Boss Hogg

Leave a comment

Filed under Roller Derby, Skater of the Month, SVRG Skaters

SVRG double header a double triumph: KillaBytes bury the Undead Bettys and Dot.Kamikazes take down the Redwood Rollers

SVRG closed out a stellar season with double wins as the KillaBytes defeated the Brentwood Undead Bettys 155-104 and the Dot.Kamikazes beat the Humboldt Redwood Rollers 159-63.

The KillaBytes, who hadn’t played a home game since May, brought in the crowds for their second home bout during the 2009 season. Considering their last bout was in August, the team was reared up and ready to take on Brentwood’s Undead Bettys last Saturday.

Although the Killas and the Bettys had not yet faced off, some of the Killas had skated with the Bettys earlier in the season against the Santa Cruz Harbor Hellcats. In the spirit of sharing, some of the Santa Cruz women helped the Bettys fill out their roster for this bout. Don’t let the numbers fool, you, though; although the Bettys may have trouble fielding 14 of their own for an away bout, they have a strong core of skaters and the Killas knew they would be tough opponents.

Given the Bettys’ lineup of brutal blockers, including Lisafer, Luna Tix, and Cemetery Mary, the Killas’ theme for the night seemed to be “Help Your Jammer Out.”  After a close first half, the Killas had crept ahead of the Bettys, 76 to 61. The KillaBytes continued to employ a number of strategies that ensured that their jammers would get the support they needed to make it through the pack efficiently and put points on the board.

Left: Dirty Thirty and Texas ChanaSaw Massacre wall up. Right: Belle Wringer, Retox Fox, and Aim De Kill pin some Bettys to clear a route for Postal Servix (Photo credits: Nocklebeast).

These strategies resulted in several high-scoring, grand-slamming jams. Zootown Throwdown, who was named the KillaBytes’ MVP by the Bettys, threw down 84 points in 11 jams, including a 20-point jam in the second half. Postal Servix toed the line 12 times, bringing home 47 points, including a 15-point jam—a remarkable feat considering the fact that a) she had to roll right in to skate for the Dot.Kamikazes in the next bout;  and b) she skated through foot pain, and after the bout she discovered she had a fracture in her foot. (Servix is now in a walking cast and out for the remainder of the season.) CynTax skated in eight jams, putting 24 points on the board. Juicy K. Tore, who also skated with the Dot.Kamz, filled out the jammer rotation.

Top left: Belle Wringer clears the line for Zootown Throwdown (Photo credit: Nocklebeast); top right: Juicy K. Tore gives Postal Servix a helping hand (Boss Hogg). Bottom left: Retox Fox contains so CynTax clear the pack (Nocklebeast); Bottom right: Captain Aim De Kill whips Zoo to the front (Nocklebeast).

The indomitable Aim De Kill, Steffen Razor, and Double Knuckles DeVille managed the pack at pivot. Belle Wringer and Satan’s Kitten both made impressive outings in their second official bout for the Killas. Mauly Anna, Retox Fox, and Dirty Thirty also worked the pack. ChanaSaw Massacre returned to the rink with her signature snowplow after a long season of injury, including a broken hand and back issues. Sadie Mae Gutz  made the comeback of the season, playing in her first bout since giving birth to a baby girl (named, yes, Sadie) less than a month ago. Don’t tell me derby girls don’t LOVE LOVE LOVE this sport, folks: that is some serious commitment.

KillaByte Captain Aim De Kill announced her retirement.

And speaking of someone who has some serious LOVE LOVE LOVE for this sport, the KillaByte captain, Aim DeKill, announced her retirement  at the bout. Although she will not be skating next season, she will be taking an active role as a coach, helping our new class of bootcampers in the spring. All of the Silicon Valley Roller Girls want to thank Aim, our Mama Byte, for being such a remarkable and compassionate skater and friend. She truly embodies all that is the SVRG spirit.

Unfortunately, as is the way with derby, your reporter had to work during the Dot.Kamikazes bout, so my observations are here and there. Check out our announcer Killer Vee’s writeup here and her KillaBytes writeup here.

From what I could see, the Humboldt Redwood Rollers looked like a very coordinated and agile team. In the end, however, they were no match for the Dot.Kamikaze defense and power jamming. The stats show that, aside from Sissy Jr. scoring 13 points in the second jam, the Dot.Kamikaze pack prevented Humboldt’s jammers from ever making more than one scoring pass in a given jam. The Dot.Kam jammers frequently managed more than one scoring pass through the pack and often grand-slammed Humboldt. Pia Mess thrilled the crowd as she closed out the game with a 25 (arguably 30, as she was shooting through the pack as the whistle blew) point jam.

Here are some shots from the game:

Left: SKooter Ov'r eyes a Roller, while Lizapalooza takes out two blockers and the jammer singlehandedly, clearing the way for Dollface (Nocklebeast). Middle: MisTits makes a Roller a Flyer (Boss Hogg). Right: Donna Diggler and Lindsay Lohanded pick off a Humboldt jammer (Boss Hogg).

Left: SKooter Ov'r eyes a Roller, while Lizapalooza takes out two blockers and the jammer singlehandedly, clearing the way for Dollface (Nocklebeast). Middle: MisTits makes a Roller into a Flyer. Right: Donna Diggler and Lindsay Lohanded pick off the Humboldt jammer.

Left: Smash 'n' Burn deftly stays in bounds. Middle: Smack Dahlia provides her own D. Right: Death by Dollface gets a monster whip from Pia Mess. (All photos: Boss Hogg).

7 Comments

Filed under Roller Derby, SVRG Bouts

SVRG Dot.Kamikazes dominate the Orange County Crushers, 132-64

The best offense is a good defense. L: Pia Mess takes care of an OC blocker. R: Aim De Kill controls not one but two of OC's pack.

The best offense is a good defense. L: Pia Mess takes care of an OC blocker. R: Aim De Kill controls not one but two of OC's pack. Photos: Jim Cottingham

Reporting by Kimfectious

When I say SV, you say RG! Over and over, Skooter Ov’r got the crowd pumped up to cheer for their hometown favorites, the Dot.Kamikazes, as they battled it out with Orange County’s Orange Crushers.  As the two teams rolled out, Juicy K. Tore of SVRG cartwheeled her way into her birthday bout, setting the mood for a fun and action packed night.  The crowd was already going nuts as the girls lined up for the first whistle blow.

Juicy K. Tore celebrated her birthday bout by cartwheeling out onto the track and enjoying an extra long birthday spank alley at half time.

Juicy K. Tore celebrated her birthday bout by cartwheeling out onto the track and enjoying an extra long birthday spank alley at half time. Photos: Jim Cottingham

Pia Mess started off the first jam with 14 points.  Both her booty and her attitude taunted the opposing team with “I dare you.”  Smash & Burn, Smack Dahlia, and Terribelle Demise proved to be a strong jammer rotation for Silicon Valley, with Wild Bella, B Train, D Cup Runneth Over, and Ice Cube sportin’ the star for Orange County.  OC’s Kina Wahine also served double duty, jamming and playing defense in the pack.

SVRG had the advantage of a full roster, while the Orange Crushers played with only 11 skaters.  None of this seemed to faze Kina Wahine. The Hawaiian honey of Orange County skated full force in the pack.  She led the Crushers in the right direction and constantly had her eyes locked on the SVRG jammer.  Also bringin’ it for OC was Brik Wall and Street Cred. Both ladies dished out some gnarly hits. Loca Mafiosa, Hell Toro, Rotten O, and Mia Roller comprised the rest of the Crusher defense.

Who said blockers have all the fun? Photo: Jim Cottingham

Who said blockers have all the fun? Photo: Jim Cottingham

Mistits and Rot Wheels, SVRG’s pivots, held down the front while Donna Diggler, Juicy K. Tore, The Beast, Lizapalooza, Aim to Kill, Lindsay Lohanded, Postal Servix, and Death by Dollface rocked the defense in the rest of the pack. This wall of black and green worked together to smush the Crushers to the outside or drive them to the inside, leaving just inches for the SVRG jammer to sneak by.

By jam 9, the score was OC 15 and SVRG 50.  Then Silicon Valley’s dynamic defense, by both blockers and jammers, denied Orange County any points for 8 jams in a row.  Kina Wahine muscled through and scored two points in the 19th jam of the period.

Pia Mess proved her diversity as a player, by playing every single position in the pack, and as a jammer she had an awesome average of 6.33 points per jam. In her first game as a Dot.Kamikaze, Postal Servix proved to be an effective blocker and jammer.  She scored 14 points in three jams, and just may be rookie of the season.

In the second half, Orange County came back strong.  They effectively used the twenty foot rule (i.e., a blocker must be within 20 feet of the pack in order to hit or engage the jammer) to control the pack and score some points. B-train and Ice Cube each chipped away at the score, getting a few points and then calling off the jam before SVRG could score.  The Orange Crushers were lead jammer for the first seven jams, until SVRG’s Pia Mess came back in the 8th jam as lead jammer.  As the second half went on, SVRG kept getting stronger and scoring more points.  Both teams were all smiles as the last jam ran out, final score 134 to 67. After a victory lap, each team announced its MVPs, with Smack Dahlia, who jammed for 41 points, representing SVRG, and Street Cred and her awesome defense winning it for the OC.

Thanks again to the awesome Kimfectious for the reporting!

We would like to give a special thanks to all of the Santa Cruz Derby Girls fans who came out to support your NorCal sisters—your presence and cheering was much appreciated!

As per usual, we would like to thank our hard-working ref and NSO staff; our great announcing team, Timothy Jordan, 92.3 FM’s Teddy Bynum, and SVRG Renaissance woman Skooter Ov’r; our wonderful coaches, Pandamonium, Left Turn Only, and Pia Mess; our volunteers, for their hard work; and our families, friends,sponsors, and fans for their forever support.

Don’t forget to mark your calendars for SVRG’s last home game, a doubleheader at San Jose Skate on November 14!! You’ll get to see both the Dot.Kamikazes and the KillaBytes in their last game of the season!

1 Comment

Filed under Roller Derby, SVRG Bouts

KillaBytes Topple Santa Cruz Harbor Hellcats, 122-109

SVRG, SCRG, and the SC groms after the bout. Photo credit: Jim Cottingham

SVRG, SCRG, and the SC groms after the bout. Photo credit: Jim Cottingham

The KillaBytes were full of excitement for their fourth official bout of the season, and all the better that they were facing the Harbor Hellcats from SVRG’s favorite friendly rival, the Santa Cruz Derby Girls. The anticipation continued to build as the announcement was made that the Civic Auditorium had sold out and the teams would be facing off in front of a packed house of more than 1,100 derby fans. The KillaBytes wanted to hold on to SVRG’s reign after the Dot.Kamikazes defeated SCDG’s Boardwalk Bombshells in a thrilling throwdown this past June; the Harbor Hellcats were equally motivated to take back the crown and send the Valley girls home with a loss.

Although this was the first showdown for these teams, several players had encountered each other on the rink before. A few KillaBytes had played against the Hellcats before when the Bytes helped fill out the roster for the Brentwood Brawlin’ Betties earlier this year. Also, both the KillaBytes and the Hellcats roster for this game featured several A/B swing players that had played against each other when the A-teams faced off in June. There was plenty of new blood, however; both teams also featured skaters making their official bout debuts: Satan’s Kitten, Belle Wringer, and Beth Sentence for the KillaBytes and Hallie Peña Popper and Astrid Avenger for the Hellcats. Going into the match, the teams were well-matched on skill, experience, and, yes, a little bloodlust.

The KillaBytes had been practicing as a team leading up to the bout, but some last minute roster changes rattled their nerves a bit. Aim DeKill managed to contract an ear infection from the SVRG Jell-O wrestling fundraiser the previous weekend, so the KillaBytes were short one of their captains and a powerful pivot. The team resolved to win one for their MamaByte, and alternate Feisty Irish stepped in for blocking duty. The team suffered another roster shakeup right before the game when Juicy K. Tore, who was set to block and jam, got a nasty case of shin splints during the warmup. Santa Cruz graciously dispatched Shamrock N. Roller to try to soothe the Juice, but she was fearful of a recurrence during the game. With great disappointment, she requested that the second alternate, Smack Dahlia, come out of the stands to take her place, but Smack was only permitted to block. Because of the last minute change, Smack’s only warmup consisted of the rollout during the team introductions.

Left: Skoot and Fox hold the Santa Cruz jammer while Secret Servix whips off of The Beast. Right: Smack Dahlia and Beth Sentence wall up to contain the Santa Cruz blockers. Photos: Jim Cottingham

Left: Skoot and Fox hold the Santa Cruz jammer while Postal Servix whips off of The Beast. Right: Smack Dahlia and Beth Sentence wall up to contain the Santa Cruz blockers. Photos: Jim Cottingham

Now down a jammer, the pressure was on the KillaByte jammer rotation. Zootown Throwdown kicked off the bout with a 9-0 shutout jam, quickly followed by a 4-0 jam by Postal Servix to get the KillaBytes off to a strong start. Over the course of the game, Zootown scored a remarkable 55 points, Servix snagged lead jammer 7 times, and CynTax delivered a decisive high-scoring jam in the second half that sealed SCDG’s fate. Feisty Irish and SKooter Ov’r also took the line once each for SVRG. Santa Cruz relied mostly on the speedy Liv N. Letdie, Pippi Hardsocking, Kiki Clash, and Cleopatra Catastrophe at the jammer line. It was also worth noting that throughout the bout, jammers from both teams were aggressive, leading to some hot jammer-on-jammer action. Servix and Feisty Irish both went after their opposing jammers, and Santa Cruz’s Liv N. Letdie frequently engaged Zootown while Pippi Hardsocking bounced several blockers.

The game featured some killer defense. Top left: Some of The Beast's aftermath. Top right: Fox socks a wincing Pippi. Bottom left: Beast and Dirty put the squeeze on Liv N. Letdie. Bottom right: Pigeon executes a killer C-block on Postal Servix. Photos by Kelco (top left, top right, bottom left) and Jim Cottingham (bottom right).

The game featured some killer defense. Top left: Some of The Beast’s aftermath. Top right: Fox socks a wincing Pippi. Bottom left: Beast and Dirty put the squeeze on Liv N. Letdie. Bottom right: Pigeon executes a killer C-block on Postal Servix. Photos by Kelco (top left, top right, bottom left) and Jim Cottingham (bottom right).

With such a speedy and effective group of jammers, both teams’ defense was crucial in this game. Indeed, the game was filled with solid blocks, relentless waterfalls, and killer hits. Co-captain Steffen Razor typically ran the front of the pack, with Servix, Smack, and Feisty also serving pivot duty. Beth Sentence, Belle Wringer, and Satan’s Kitten walled up with the pivot and helped hold the line against SCDG’s persistent jammers—no small feat given that the Santa Cruz track has tighter turns than most tracks, and thus additional dexterity and precision is required. Mauly Anna and Dirty Thirty used their experience to communicate with their teammates and moved around the pack to address the local threat. Feisty Irish was a constant menace, singlehandedly containing jammers at the back of the pack, while Retox Fox sat on jammers if they tried to force their way through the pack. The Beast was as formidable a force as always, bouncing jammers and blockers alike and leaving a trail of fallen girls in her wake. She met her match in Santa Cruz’s powerful Pigeon, and the fours often battled it out at the back of the pack, helping their respective jammers while putting their opponents on the floor. Indeed, these two ladies kept the crowd going wild watching their handiwork.

Left: Skoot provides some offensive coverage to jammer Zootown. Right: Coach Panda looks on as Hue Refner ejects SKooter for her fifth penalty in the half. Photos: Jim Cottingham

Left: SKoot provides some offensive coverage to jammer Zootown. Right: Coach Panda looks on as Hue Refner ejects SKooter for her fifth penalty in the half. Photos: Jim Cottingham

SKooter Ov’r also did considerable blocking for the KillaBytes, using her positional blocking skills as well as some killer curving hits to floor some jammers. Unfortunately, her big hits attracted attention from the refs, and she got boxed all too frequently—as in five-times-in-one-half too frequently. SKoot became the first KillaByte to be ejected from a game for penalty accumulation. But, as the Santa Cruz announcers noted, she did it while maintaining sportswomanlike behavior, and so after Hue Refner gave her the thumb-over-the-shoulder, they graced her with a farewell lap while the scoreboard flashed, “BAD GIRL.”

Coaches Left Turn Only and Pandamonium. Their brains are so in synch that their outfits naturally match themselves. Photo: Nocklebeast

Coaches Left Turn Only and Pandamonium. Their brains are so in synch that their outfits naturally match themselves. Photo: Nocklebeast

The ejection left SVRG down a blocker, but at this point in the game each team was fighting to keep five on the track. The penalty whiteboard was filled with players who were one minor away from a trip to the box, and both teams’ coaches selectively staffed their jams hoping to keep as many players on the track as possible. With less than fifteen minutes left to go in the game, the two teams were still trading off jams and keeping the score tight. At this point it was clear just how evenly matched these teams were on skill—now it was a matter of strategy. SVRG coaches Pandamonium and Left Turn Only were ON IT. With one eye on the scoreboard, one eye on the penalty board, one eye on the box, one eye on the bench, and one eye on the emerging Santa Cruz lineup (yes, collectively they MUST have at least five eyes), they were able to decide on, condense, and dispatch strategies in the mere seconds between each jam. Their efforts showed a superhuman attention to every detail of the game and in the last minutes, it was their guidance that helped the KillaBytes pull ahead of the Hellcats and bring the win back to the Valley.

Some Dot.Kamikazes and other SVRG supporters shake up the stands as they cheer on the KillaBytes. Photos: Jim Cottingham

Some Dot.Kamikazes and other SVRG supporters shake up the stands as they cheer on the KillaBytes. Photos: Jim Cottingham

The KillaBytes would like to thank first and foremost their amazing coaches, Pandamonium, Left Turn Only, and Pia Mess for preparing them for this game; our wonderful pack o’ zebras; our awesome SVRG cheering section, who stirred up the arena despite being outnumbered 10 to 1; and the gracious hostesses with the mostesses, the fantastic ladies of SCDG. I am not alone in saying this was the most fun bout of the season, and we have Santa Cruz to thank for it. Thanks to the Santa Cruz Derby Groms for putting on such an amazing half-time show: it is refreshing to see the derby girls of tomorrow carrying the torch for our sport. Thanks to all of the photographers and videographers who helped film the bout, especially our team photographer Jim Cottingham. Thanks again to all of our fans, sponsors, and supporters. The KillaBytes will see you at our next home bout in November!

Want to hear more about the bout? Hit up Killer Vee’s writeup here. She’s got some great jam-by-jam data.

You can see Jim Cottingham’s photos here, Nocklebeast’s here, and Kelco‘s here.

5 Comments

Filed under Roller Derby, SVRG Bouts

SVRG Dot.Kamikazes dominate ACDG Rocket Queens, 209-45

It's a girl! SVRG's Death by Dollface, Rot Wheels, and Aim de Kill contain the ACDG defense while birthing jammer Pia Mess.

It's a girl! SVRG's Death by Dollface, Rot Wheels, and Aim de Kill contain the ACDG defense while birthing jammer Pia Mess. Photo credit: Jim Cottingham

This past Saturday, SVRG hosted the Angel City Derby Girls’ Rocket Queens at San Jose Skate. A turn in unseasonably cool August weather heated up the venue, but thankfully there was plenty of Pabst Blue Ribbon and Faultline beer to keep the crowd cooled off.

This bout was a notable event for two skaters: First, Death by Dollface made her triumphant return to the track. Not only was she the typical terror on wheels in the pack, but she also took a couple of turns jamming—and grand slamming—scoring a 15-point jam and then closing out the game with a 20-point jam. Second, this was blocker/fear-invoker The Beast’s first bout on the Dot.Kamikaze roster this season, and she brought down the house…not to mention a number of Rocket Queens. My personal favorite moment of the bout was looking up to see a downed Beast springing up from the floor, catching up with the pack, and singlehandedly taking out the Rocket Queens’ 4, then their 3, and then the jammer, all within a half-lap of the track…phenomenal.

Walls

These ain't no sugar walls. Left: Death by Dollface and Rot Wheels pin back a Rocket Queen jammer. Right: Feisty Irish and Pia Mess partner up at the back of the pack. Photo credit: Jim Cottingham

Indeed, SVRG’s defense stalled the ACDG jammers. While blocking, Pia Mess buzzed around jammers, keeping them engaged long enough to secure the SVRG jammer a grand slam before ACDG could manage a scoring pass. Aim De Kill, Rot Wheels, and BootyVicious often controlled the front of the pack, while Feisty Irish hovered near the back, keeping ACDG neatly contained. Donna Diggler and SKooter Ov’r delivered swooping hits while Rot Wheels picked Rocket Queen blockers off the line, insuring safe passage for the SVRG jammers. The SVRG defense was so successful that they held ACDG scoreless in 21 of the 34 jams, and ACDG only scored more than 4 points in a jam once.

Booty evades

BootyVicious stays low and balanced as she gracefully evades a killer hit. Photo credit: Jim Cottingham

Offensively, SVRG was unstoppable. Eleven of SVRG’s 14 skaters took a turn at the jammer line. Aside from usual jammers Smack Dahlia, Smashleigh aka Smashes of Evil, Terribelle Demise, and Pia Mess (who raced to a 19-point jam), Dot.Kamikazes Feisty Irish, Juicy K. Tore, BootyVicious, Death by Dollface, Lizapalooza, SKooter Ov’r, and team captain Rot Wheels (who scored a 15-point jam) all donned the star cap. SVRG completed eight jams with 10+ points.

You can see more amazing photos from the bout at Jim Cottingham’s site here.

SVRG would like to thank our amazing coaches, Pandamonium, Left Turn Only (so glad to see you running around again!), and Pia Mess. Thanks to the Angel City Rocket Queens for making the trek up to see us. Thanks to our amazing bout coordinator and totally-on-it crew: Lizapalooza, Death by Dollface, Frida Khill*ya, and Broken Babydoll, plus all the other SVRGs working their buns off. Special thanks to our wonderful zebras Texas Tea Bag, Jonny Demonic, Hannah Grenade, Hue Refner, Ulrich Von Hurtem, Winnie Baygo, and Randy Eye Candy, and our herd of NSOs: Jacques Strappe, Se7en Year Bitch, Frida Khill*ya, Sam Hain, Rocky Launcher, Dorothy Vader, Cole Cocked, Mauly Anna, Lindsay Lohanded, Organ Doaner, ChanaSaw Massacre, Belle Wringer, Frisky Business, and 18 Wheeler. Special shoutout to our girl (and NSO) Needles Fever! Thanks to our fab announcers: SVRG’s own Lip$tick Bandita (can’t wait ‘til you’re back on the track, chica), radio host Teddy Bynum, and the always fabulous, multi-talented Timothy Jordan. Thank you Dr. Tony Kearns for keeping us all together. A final thanks to all of our volunteers, sponsors, and fans—we couldn’t do it without you!

1 Comment

Filed under SVRG Bouts

Team White slips past Team Black in SVRG/BADG mixed scrimmage, 86-69

Thank you to the ever talented Double Easy for the recap of our last exhibition bout of the summer! If you weren’t there, too bad…but you can get your derby fill Saturday, August 8th, at our next home bout at San Jose Skate!

SVRG’s last free outdoor exhibition bout of the 2009 summer was held
last Sunday at 5pm at Roosevelt Park in downtown San Jose. At around
80 degrees F, the afternoon was much cooler than those of the last two
exhibition bouts, which experienced approximate temperatures of 90 and
100 degrees F. SVRG had split into our traditional scrimmage colors of
black and white, but this time we had invited our friends and big
sisters, the girls of the B.ay A.rea D.erby Girls (or the BAD Girls
for short), to bolster our ranks. With both teams having 19 or 20
skaters each as opposed to the 10 or 11 of the previous exhibitions,
this last bout was a more relaxing and less exhausting way for SVRG to
end the summer.

Because of the wide variety of skill levels in the skaters (from
rookies who had been playing for a few months to nationals-level
skaters who had been playing for 5 or 6 years), each team divided into
experienced and less-experienced skaters. The black and white teams
made an agreement that the jams would alternate between
more-experienced and less-experienced skaters.

The bout started off fairly evenly, with both teams trading off small
leads in the score. It was not until the middle of the first half that
the white team began to pull away, slowly adding small victories to
their score. In fact there were no enormous point-scoring jams in this
bout. The highest-scoring jam for the white team was a 10-pointer from
Terribelle Demise, and the highest-scoring jam for the black team was
a 9-pointer from Trixie Pixie. These two skaters also had the honor of
being their teams’ highest individual point-scorers, with 21 points in
6 jams for Terribelle and 23 points in 6 jams for Trixie.

White jammers had a particularly tough time getting by black team BAD
Girls Taxi Scab and Liza Machete. However, the black team had an
exceptionally difficult time keeping back quick and agile white jammer
and team captain Brawllen Angel, who scored 18 points in 4 jams and
was also a force to be reckoned with in the pack.

At the end of the first period, the score was 50-25 in favor of white.
The black team took advantage of the 15-minute halftime to regroup and
discuss strategy. This plan worked out for them as the black team
pulled themselves back together as soon as the second period started
and managed to outscore the white team in the second half 44-36.

With about a minute and a half left in the bout, the score was 74-52
in favor of white. With a 22-point deficit, in order to bounce back
the white team would need one incredible jam or two very very good
jams. Black sent out diminutive BADG girl rookie Trixie Pixie to jam,
and white sent out SVRG’s The Undietaker, a rookie member of the
Dot.Kamikazes and a former hockey player. Black got the power jam they
had been looking for when Trixie took lead jammer and The Undietaker
got sent to the penalty box. The formidable white defense was giving
Trixie a bit of trouble and held her to 9 points before Trixie
shrewdly called off the jam with only a few seconds on the clock. At
this point black team captain Taxi Scab instantly called a time out in
order to get one last jam in. With the 9-0 from the last jam, the
score was now 74-61 in favor of white. Black now sent in BADG travel
team jammer Jane Hammer (who, by the way, pulled her team from a
last-jam deficit of 20 points against Sacred City at The Big One
California Tournament in May to tie the game, eventually scoring
_another_ 20 points in triple overtime to win the game) to jam against
a boxed Undietaker. Both teams knew that this would be the last jam
and the deciding jam of the game, and opted to send in their strongest
defense, which included Brawllen Angel, Demanda Riot, and Killer Vee
for the white team, and Liza Machete, Taxi Scab, and sKooter Ov’r for
the black team. Jane Hammer quickly swept through the pack and picked
up lead jammer. However, by this time The Undietaker was finished
serving her penalty time and quickly returned to the track,
immediately slipping her jammer star to pivot and never-fail jammer
Brawllen Angel. Brawllen zipped through the pack like lightening,
followed closely behind by Hammer. Both black and white defenses
picked up, but in the end the white team had outscored the black team
in the last jam 12-8, leading to a final score of 86-69 in favor of
white.

Black team roster: Aim DeKill, 3 / Smashes of Evil, 86’d / Zootown
Throwdown, 406 / BootyVicious, 13 / Retox Fox, 90proof / The Beast, 8
/ Juicy K. Tore, 88 / Lizapalooza, 217 / Satan’s Kitten, 333 / sKooter
Ov’r, 76 / Taxi Scab, 50 cents a mile / Pandamonium, 0 / Trixie Pixie,
360 / Elle Lectrick, >21 / Lemmy Chokeya, 88 / Sinnocent, 594 / La
Chica Mala, 1 kilo / Liza Machete, 1 / Frank N. Hurter, 73 / Jane
Hammer, 777

White team roster: Steffen Razor, 54-46 / The Smack Dahlia, 0147 /
Cyn-tax, 1040EZ / Terribelle Demise, 187 / Dirty Thirty, 10-30 /
Postal Servix, (314) / Donna Diggler, 12 1/2 inches / The Undietaker,
2125 / Bitch Puddin’, Triple 5’s / Double Easy, 238 / Killer Vee, 33 /
Kimfectious, 47 / Tramplesteelskin / Chesty Gillespie, 34DD /
Velveteen Savage, 1.618 / Brawllen Angel, 888 / Bonnie Doom, 444 /
Demanda Riot, 0:00 / Major Drama, 1st

3 Comments

Filed under Sister Leagues, SVRG Bouts

KillaBytes trounce Ventura Battalion of Skates, 202-32; Dot.Kamikazes defeat Vendolls, 70-67

Both SVRG teams loaded up and headed to sunny SoCal to take on Ventura County Derby Darlins. The KillaBytes faced off against Ventura’s Battalion of Skates, and the Dot.Kamikazes took on the Vendolls.

The Killas were pumped for their game for several reasons. They had been practicing several strategies that they wanted to test out in a bout. Because both SVRG teams have been impacted by inevitable injuries, we were thrilled that some of our friends at CCRD would be helping us fill out our roster. Also, there were some bout cherries to be popped: Bitch Puddin’ and yours truly, Retox Fox, skated in our first official bout—and let me tell you, it was great to break 200 points in our first outing!

Double Easy, CynTax, Zootown Throwdown, and Postal Servix handled most of the jamming duty. Golden Delicious, on loan from CCRD, also jammed a couple of times. During one jam pivot Steffen Razor received a star pass from Double Easy to also put some points on the board.  Aim De Kill, Retox Fox, and Badass Blondee (CCRD) also each jammed once, with Aim scoring 16 points and Blondee securing 20 in the last jam of the game.

Top left: Postal Servix prepares for another high-scoring jam. Top right: Lead jammer CynTax completes a grand slam. Bottom left: Servix controls the pack while Steffen Razor (r) jams after Easy's star pass. Bottom left: Aim De Kill rallies during her 16 point jam.

Top left: Postal Servix prepares for another high-scoring jam. Top right: Lead jammer CynTax completes a grand slam. Bottom left: Servix controls the pack while Steffen Razor (r) jams after Easy's star pass. Bottom left: Aim De Kill rallies during her 16 point jam. Photos: Nathan Quihuis & Patrick Wills

The KillaByte blockers were also on their game. Mafia Mistress (CCRD) and Bitch Puddin’ effectively held the line against Ventura’s jammers. Aim, Steffen, Servix, Mauly Anna, and Dirty Thirty often teamed up in twos or threes to form impenetrable walls at the front of the pack. In my opinion, it was our 4s who were the most formidable presence on the track. The Beast often had Ventura’s jammer on the ground a half-dozen times in a single jam, while Badass Blondee doled out the kind of hits that could give a girl amnesia.

Left: Bitch Puddin' lets Double Easy sneak by on the line while Steffen Razor goes after Ventura's jammer. Right: Beast and CynTax come out ready for action. Photos: Nathan Quihuis

Left: Bitch Puddin' helps Double Easy sneak by on the line while Steffen Razor goes after Ventura's jammer. Right: Beast and CynTax come out ready for action. Photos: Nathan Quihuis

The bout had its share of memorable moments. At one point, the KillaBytes had 2 blockers in the box and a third didn’t make it onto the track before the whistle blew, leaving Aim De Kill to hold down the fort against the Battalion of Skates all by herself! All in all, it was a fun game, and we were happy to share the track with such a gracious bunch of ladies.

Aim takes on Ventura singlehandedly. Photo: Lindsay

Aim takes on Ventura singlehandedly. Photo: Lindsay

The Dot.Kamikazes were impressed by the Killas’ point margin, but they knew they had their work cut out for them. The Vendolls are known for being a hard-hitting bunch that like to travel in a fast pack. While the Dot.Kams have the speed and endurance to run with a fast pack, they had an additional challenge. As SVRG is used to skating on an indoor track, the outdoor rink’s polished concrete surface was an advantage to the home team. In the first half, several of the Dot.Kamikazes skidded out on the corners as their hard, rink-accustomed wheels slid on the slick surface. Ventura wisely took advantage of SVRG’s unfamiliarity with the surface, delivering hits on slippery turns and having their jammers sneak by when SVRG’s blockers drifted from the line. As a result, some Dot.Kams swapped out their wheels for grippier ones during halftime, which led to significantly fewer falls in the second half.

There was some fine skating to be seen in this bout. Both teams’ impressive defense kept the jams relatively low-scoring, although Ventura’s superspeedy Devious Dutchess had a couple of amazing runs. Both teams successfully employed solid walls to trap their opponents and waterfalls to deliver repeated hits to the opposing jammers. Ventura’s blockers were especially effective at popping up after hard hits and speeding back into the pack.

For the Dot.Kams, Smashleigh, Smack Dahlia, Terribelle Demise, The Undie Taker, and Pia Mess handled jamming, with Terribelle, Undie Taker, and Pia doing double duty as blockers too. Rot Wheels, Lizapalooza, Lindsay Lohanded, Juicy K. Tore, SKooter Ov’r, and Donna Diggler rocked the defense. Steffen Razor, who had already skated full-time in the Killas game, demonstrated her remarkable endurance by also skating on the Dot.Kams roster.

You can read about the bout from Chris of The Best Damn Sports Show Period here.

SVRG would like to thank Ventura for hosting us, and to our great zebra and NSO crew. Thanks to Weavin’ Kohl Bear, Texas T-Bag, Jonny Demonic, Se7en Year Bitch, and Private ChokeHer for coming down to SoCal with us. The KillaBytes would like to extend a special thank you to CCRD’s Badass Blondee, Golden Delicious, and Mafia Mistress, who helped us fill out our roster. You ladies were a perfect fit! Thank you to our amazing coaches, Left Turn Only and Pia Mess for the KillaBytes, and LTO and Death by Dollface for the Dot.Kamikazes. An additional thanks to Pandamonium for working so hard to prep us in her absence. Special thanks to all of our friends and family who came to Ventura to support us! We know it was a long drive but it kept us motivated to hear all the SVRG cheering!

4 Comments

Filed under Roller Derby, SVRG Bouts