Skater of the Month: Skirt Vonna-Gut

The Skater of the Month for August is none other than the dreaded Skirt Vonna-Gut.  Skirt joined SVRG in January 2011 after completing boot camp in December 2010.  Besides a bit of childhood roller blading, derby is the first sport she’s played, and remains her one love in the athletic world.  She named herself more of a “drama kid” than an athlete, but you’d never know it to see her on the track. Since her first bout in April 2010, she’s been slaughtering countless opposing teams with the KillaBytes.  Her agility and aggression are more than just hocus pocus; her skating is an example of what hard work and skill can accomplish. Skirt’s always working on her skating skills, and can be seen trying new jumps, spins and tricks out on the track at every practice. Her favorite position is jamming; she holds the record for the highest scoring jam in the league with 33 points while playing against the Five Cities Roller Kitties.

Skirt was attracted to derby because the sport combines community with individuality.  Though on the outside almost everything about Skirt screams originality, she is incredibly team-oriented.  When asked who she looks up to in roller derby, she replied, “My KillaBytes! The greatest team ever!”  Skirt works hard off the track, too, as both the Events Head and Volunteer Coordinator.  She was the mastermind behind much of the planning for SVRG’s exhibition bouts this season, including the SubZERO art festival and the Hot San Jose Nights car show.

When asked to give advice to future derby girls out there, Skirt pointed out that being successful in derby requires more than just skating skill.  The breakfast of champions in the derby world includes a full serving of leadership experience.  SVRG, like most derby teams, is skater-owned and operated, meaning every skater must do his or her part to keep the league running smoothly.  “Your league needs so much help with everything,” advises Skirt, “Here’s the opportunity for you to step up and see what you’re made of.”

And yes, just in case you were wondering, Skirt is named after Kurt Vonnegut Jr., who is in fact, her favorite author.  You may have heard the rumors of Skirt’s imminent departure from SVRG, while she moves to the Sacramento area to start a PhD program in Sociology (there’s much more under her helmet than just dreads!)  You’ll see her out on the track soon though; Skirt plans to continue playing derby with Sacred City. We here at SVRG will be sad to see her go, knowing any league she joins in the future will be lucky to have her. Good luck, Skirty!

SVRG’s 3rd Annual Blood Drive

SVRG’s 3rdAnnual Blood Drive is Saturday, August 25!

SVRG partners with the American Red Cross this Saturday forour 3rd Annual Blood Drive. The Donation Bus will be in front of San Jose Skate, located at 397 Blossom Hill Road in San Jose from 9 a.m to 3 p.m.

According to the American Red Cross, blood donation is downmore than ten percent across the country. One pint is collected during anindividual blood donation. One pint of blood can save up to three lives.

How Can I Donate?

To schedule your appointment, visit redcrossblood.org,select “Make a Blood Donation Appointment” and search by our sponsor code:Skate. You can also call 1-800-RED-CROSS (1-800-733-2767).

Learn about Tips for a Successful Donation here: http://www.redcrossblood.org/donating-blood/tips-successful-donation

Remember to bring your donor card, driver’s license, or two other forms of identification

All presenting donors will be entered to win tickets toSilicon Valley’s next home bout on September 29.

Hard Drivers Sizzle at Hot San Jose Nights

SVRG’s Hard Drivers hosted an exhibition bout against Black Thunder from Santa Cruz at Hot San Jose Nights on July 14^th. SVRG pocketed a third win this season against our sisters from over the hill, with a final score of 233-71. Unleasha Moore amazed the crowds with a 26-point jam in the first period. Skirt Vonna-Gut entertained fans by jumping over 3 girls during halftime. Here’s a photoblog of the action.

Contain

©2012 Mike Ko, SiliconValley Designs, SVRG’s Volcanic Ash, Absolutely Scabulous, Bullet Sucker, and Skirt Vonna-Gut Contain SCDG’s Jammer Shanks A. Million

Control

©2012 Mike Ko, SiliconValley Designs, SVRG’s Jem Jones, Mongoose, Bullet Sucker, Surge, and Culo Whippin’ Control Pack Speed

Distract

©2012 Mike Ko, SiliconValley Designs, Bullet Sucker, Coach Aim DeKill, Mad 4 Gravy, Skirt Vonna-Gut, Foo Bar, Evel Kniebreaker, and Volcanic Ash Get Distracted by a Big Hit

Destroy

©2012 Mike Ko, SiliconValley Designs, SVRG’s Bullet Sucker and Mad 4 Gravy Destroy SCDG’s Jammer Aubrey Rough

It was great to see some new faces out on the track…

©2012 Mike Ko, SiliconValley Designs, SVRG’s New Faces: Volcanic Ash, Patty Hearse, and Foo Bar

…and to witness the triumphant return of Skater Tots!

©2012 Mike Ko, SiliconValley Designs, SVRG’s Skater Tots, Unleasha Moore, Mongoose, and SCDG’s Skye Skrapper

Derby Funtimes!

©2012 Mike Ko, SiliconValley Designs, SVRG’s Hard Drivers and SCDG’s Black Thunder

These wonderful photos were taken by Mike Ko of SiliconValley Designs. Let’s show him some derby love by liking his Facebook page!

Win, Lose, or Tie, SVRG ‘til We Die!

On Saturday, June 23^rd at San Jose Skate, SVRG hosted teams from Salt Lake City, Utah, and San Luis Obispo County for a double header that kept fans cheering for 4 hours of non-stop derby action. If you missed out, here’s a recap.

©2012 Mark Nockleby, Ali3 Kitt3n paws at Pia Mess

Dot.Kamikazes vs. Wasatch Midnight Terror

The girls from Salt Lake City used the successful tactic of getting lead and calling off the jam before SVRG had a chance to score. Wasatch secured lead jammer 4 times as often as the Dots, and the score inched up as Wasatch nickel-and-dimed their way while holding SVRG scoreless.

It was Lindsay Lohanded’s first game back from medical leave this season; and she made a fierce 2-woman wall with Catherine Beata Bones. However, the Dots served double the time that Wasatch spent in the box, and a halftime score of 132-35 didn’t bode well. For a play-by-play of the 2^nd period, read the textcast on Derby News Network.

Throughout the game, Wasatch rotated 4 jammers—Ali3 Kitt3n, Harry Slaughter, Moon Raker (high-scorer with 91 points), and Skull Candi. SVRG named Ali3 Kitt3n as Wasatch’s MVP, and Wasatch chose SVRG’s Catherine Beata Bones for MVP in recognition of her amazing blocking skills. Pia Mess was the Dots’ high-scoring jammer with a total of 36 points.

It’s midpoint in the season, and Wasatch Roller Derby’s Midnight Terror came from Utah to contend for seeding at the WFTDA Western Regional Playoffs. Wasatch’s defeat of SVRG (261-70) and Santa Cruz (158-69) during their West Coast tour gives them a shot at the playoffs between the top 10 teams in the region this fall. At the end of the 1^st quarter, SVRG was ranked 12^th, Wasatch was 15^th, and Santa Cruz was 17^th in the West. We’ll have to wait and see how these games affect the 2^nd quarter standings.

©2012 Mark Nockleby, Asian Orange, Avida Sane, and Skirt Vonna-Gut contain 5 Cities Roller Kitties’ jammer

KillaBytes vs. 5 Cities Roller Kitties

The catfight between San Luis Obispo County’s Kitties and the KillaBytes was one of many firsts. It was Evel Kniebreaker’s first time on a Killa’s roster, and Volcanic Ash’s first bout skating with SVRG after transferring from Sin City Rollergirls. It was the Killa’s first win by a landslide 250 points and the first time any SVRG jammer scored 33 points in a single jam.

The Killas showed strong defensive skills, holding the Kitties scoreless in 21 out of 33 total jams. By the end of the 1^st period, the Killas had already secured a 139-point lead (174-35). During a Kitties’ power jam in the 2^nd half, with only 2 Killas (Surge and Evel Kniebreaker) on the track, SVRG’s 2-woman wall was able to hold the Kitties’ jammer back for a while.

In the 12^th jam of the 2^nd period, the crowd witnessed a rare moment in derby when Juicy K. Tore passed the star to Skirt Vonna-Gut who caught a unicorn on a power jam and kept going to score a total of 33 points in a single jam! They were assisted by their fearsome pack—Jem Jones, Culo Whippin’, and Asian Orange—who took a knee on the jammer line for an immediate panty pass at the start.

S.S. BattelHips led the Kitties with most points, being accountable for 24 of the 68 total points scored during the bout. Almost all the Killas took turns jamming, and the high-scorers of the night were Skirt Vonna-Gut with 52 points and Evel Kniebreaker with 39 points. Mad 4 Gravy, Juicy K. Tore, and Avida Sane scored 33 points each. The final score was 318-68.

Thanks to Wasatch Midnight Terror and the 5 Cities Roller Kitties for two great games. We appreciate all our fans, medics, Dr. Mike Rogerson chiropractor, officials, coaches, and photographers (Donalee Eiri, Mike Ko, and Mark Nockleby) for volunteering their time and talents.

Hall of Pain 2012 Edition

Hurry! Someone call the WHAMbulance!

It has been a while since we posted pics of our battle wounds. Here are some of our favorites in case there was any doubt in your mind that roller derby was a full-contact sport. WARNING: Don’t scroll down if you’re squeamish!

Skater Tots’ bionic ankle before

Skater Tots’ bionic ankle after

Spankin’ Firecracker’s hematoma from the Dust Devil Tournament

Sasha Degrader’s road rash from bouting in the parking lot at subZERO

Absolutely Scabulous’ bootyful bruise

Pins in Sasha Degrader’s Broken Thumb

Thanks to our medics for volunteering their time and expertise at our bouts and scrimmage practices:

Andrew Aragon
Karen Carlsen
Brandon Christensen
Jeff Chung
Katie Hensel
Isaak Huerta
Michelle Park

We also appreciate the generous services of our sponsor, Dr. Mike Rogerson. Rogerson Chiropractic is a family and sports chiropractic clinic in Santa Clara.

Derby Girls Give Back to the Community

SVRG loves to donate time and money to local charities. Volunteering not only gives us a chance to reach out to the community that supports us but also gives us an opportunity to bond together with our derby sisters off-skates. As an added bonus, we get enormous satisfaction from learning new skills—like using power tools! Here’s a glimpse of a few of the local nonprofits we’ve been helping out this spring.

SVRG volunteers at the Cupertino site (Left to Right): Asian Orange, Culo Whippin’, Maui Howlee, Unleasha Moore, Skirt Vonna-Gut, Mad 4 Gravy, Mama Booty (spending Mother’s Day volunteering with her daughter), Lizapalooza, Mongoose, Booty Vicious, Spankin’ Firecracker, and Surge

Habitat for Humanity, Silicon Valley

In honor of National Women Build Week, SVRG volunteered for a day at the development in Cupertino, where four houses are being built. We helped to build a fence and put up panels on the sides of three houses.

For each of our home games, SVRG donates 10% of all proceeds to charity. A portion of our March 24^th bout proceeds went to benefit Habitat for Humanity, and 100% of the profits from our Derby Girl Karaoke event at the Normandy House Lounge in Santa Clara on March 16^th were given to Habitat for Humanity. Combined, we donated about $1,000 and 100 volunteer hours to Habitat for Humanity this year alone.

For over 25 years, Habitat for Humanity Silicon Valley has been helping hard-working families who live in inadequate housing find affordable and safe places to live in Santa Clara County. Together with volunteers, these families build houses and embark on the path to homeownership, thanks to generous donations of money, labor, and supplies.

SVRG reps (Bullet Sucker, Foo Bar, Sasha Degrader, Maui Howlee, and Bad Tempt-Her) plus other One Brick volunteers help paint over graffiti in San Jose

One Brick, Silicon Valley

One Brick is a unique national organization that helps volunteers contribute to a variety of nonprofits on a drop-in or one-time basis. One Brick takes individuals or groups, and allows volunteers to commit a couple hours or an entire day. With a dozen chapters located across the continental US, volunteering in your area was never easier!

We love volunteering for One Brick projects! For the Global Day of Service on April 21^st, SVRG helped paint over graffiti in San Jose. In addition to sweat equity, 10% of our May 19^th bout proceeds went to One Brick.

Be sure to stop by our table at One Brick’s Community Dog Walk in Palo Alto on June 24^th. Meet some derby girls and their pets! Your $10 registration fee will go towards One Brick and, in return, your pooch will get a bandana and a doggie bag.

SVRG volunteers massage pepper plants (Left to Right): Smash N’ Burn, Catherine Beata Bones, Surge, Veggielution rep, Absolutely Scabulous, Skirt Vonna-Gut, and Skooter Ov’r

Veggielution, San Jose

A percentage of our June 23^rd bout proceeds will be donated to Veggielution, a community farm in San Jose. SVRG volunteers have experienced the therapeutic effects of getting their hands dirty, spending a couple of sunny days in March and May weeding and gardening. Veggielution aims to teach the public about sustainable urban farming and volunteers always go home with fresh veggies!

If your organization is in need of volunteers, shoot us an email at
community@svrollergirls.com. We’re always looking for ways to give back to the community!

Richmond Trounces Dots and Mendo Brings Mayhem

Did you miss our May 19th double header at San Jose Skate? Here’s a recap.

©2012 beakertehmuppet, SVRG’s Pia Mess gets between B.A.D.G’s Demanda Riot and Chiquita Bonanza

Dot.Kamikazes Lose to B.A.D. Girls’ Richmond Wrecking Belles 238-89

In the first few jams, SVRG countered the B.ay A.rea D.erby Girls’ scrum starts with a hit-it-and-quit-it lead jammer strategy, effectively keeping the Wrecking Belles from scoring. But in the 4^th jam, the Belles’ lead jammer Chiquita Bonanza scored 11 points to pull ahead. The Wrecking Belles kept crowding the jammer line on a knee to immediately start the jam, and the Dots kept calling it off before Richmond could score any time we had lead jammer status.

The Wrecking Belles’ defensive blockers were a force to be reckoned with, and on several occasions our jammers had trouble getting out of the pack on their initial pass. However, SVRG’s jammers Bad Tempt-Her and Pia Mess did pull out some jammer-on-jammer action. Even the fearsome Demanda Riot was toppled by SVRG’s Bionic BabyDoll as well as by Absolutely Scabulous, but Richmond’s plays were simply better overall. Numerous penalties resulted in high-scoring power jams, like the one in which Skater 26, Chantilly Mace, scored a whopping 34 points. The Wrecking Belles ran away with it and by the end of the first half had a 98-point lead.

The Dots maintained their reputation as a strong second-half team, and kept up the fight. Highlights included a star pass from Smack Dahlia to her pivot Bionic BabyDoll and a 9-point jam with Zootown Throwdown as lead jammer combined with a tight SVRG defense, which allowed the Dots to put some points on the board. Nevertheless, the deficit was too great to make a comeback, especially after Kitt Turbo passed the star to Demanda Riot racking up a total of 25 points in a single jam to pass the 2^nd century mark. Proving that we won’t roll over easily, Bad Tempt-Her scored 24 points in the last power jam. The Wrecking Belles won the game 233-89.

©2012 beakertehmuppet, Avida Sane almost gets a unicorn in the final jam.

KillaBytes Defeated by Mendo Mayhem 268-128

Our derby sisters from Mendocino County traveled to San Jose to play the Killas. It was good to see SVRG’s Mad 4 Gravy and Bitch Puddin’ back on the track for the first time this season since recovering from injuries.

Mendo took the lead early on in the 3^rd jam, when a major cut by Bullet Sucker left their jammer, ariel-LA-twister, to jam unopposed and grab 24 points. Still on a power jam in the 4^th, Mendo took a knee on the jammer line for an immediate start. Nonetheless, Mendo’s jammer Pain Galuara had trouble getting around a fierce wall made by Booty Vicious, Culo Whippin’, and Jem Jones on her initial pass. It was a different story for Pain Galuara in the 10^th jam when she made 7 laps around the track for 28 points with only 2 SVRG blockers on the track. The score was 171-41 in Mendo’s favor at the half.

Overall, Mendo was delivering some hard hits. There were penalties aplenty: JC’s Cassius Clay spent the most time in the box for Mendo and all but 2 Killas served time in the sin bin. SVRG’s jammers Mongoose and Avida Sane scored the most points for the Killas, while ariel-LA-twister, Pain Galaura, and Chica Boom piled up the points for Mendocino County.

It was déjà vu all over again when Avida Sane fought to the finish, scoring 24 points in the final jam. Mendo upset the Killas in a decisive defeat 268-128.

In both bouts SVRG made a solid effort, but our opponents nabbed lead jammer status more often. We’d like to thank the Wrecking Belles and Mendo Mayhem for giving us a level of play to strive for. This summer slump isn’t going to last long with our renewed training efforts!

$10 Tickets to Our Next Home Bout

Come watch the Dots contend for a spot at the Western Regional Playoffs in a pivotal game against Wasatch on June 23^rd. Afterwards, the Killas will catfight…bout the 5 Cities Roller Kitties, that is. As a way of saying thanks to our loyal fans, we’re offering a summer special—tickets for only 10 bucks! Get ‘em at Brown Paper Tickets before they’re sold out.

Skater of the Month: Skater Tots

©2011 Donalee Eiri, Photography by D.E.sign

What attracted you to roller derby?
A friend on Facebook kept posting about it.

Did you skate or play another sport before starting derby?
No, I was the kid who got picked last for recess games and decided people who ran were dumb, so I would walk the whole time during the Jog-a-thon. It wasn’t until I was in my 20s that I started becoming more active and that was mainly with hiking and yoga.

How did you choose your derby name?
My dad calls me “tates” or “taters” so it was a play off of that. LauRAWR’s boyfriend GilBurrito thought of it. He’s so clever!

What’s your favorite (derby) position?
I like to block, but lately I have been trying to step out of my comfort zone and jam more.

What are you known for on the track? What’s your superpower?
Uh…I make people think of cake and it is a distraction?

Do you have a pre-game ritual?
Nope. I just make sure I don’t stink before.

Tell us about your greatest derby experience.
I’ve had lots of amazing experiences through derby. I can’t really pick out the “greatest.” It’s just awesome to go from thinking, “Man, I could never do that,” to saying, “Look! I’m doing it!” which happens a lot in derby when you push yourself.

Describe your gnarliest injury.
Broke and dislocated my ankle this past January during a Sunday derby practice. The following week I had surgery and they put in a metal plate and ten screws. It has been heartbreaking not to be able to skate these past three months but I am thankful for all the support I have received from my teammates. Plus I now have a big gnarly scar—scars are cool right?

What do you contribute to SVRG *off* the track?
I am head of Human Resources. I get to handle lots of paperwork and educate people about the Policies and Procedures.

When you’re not skating, how do you pass the time? What other passions do you have?
I have my own wedding and specialty cake business, A Spoonful of Sugar in San Francisco which takes up a lot of time! I like to get ice cream with my BFF LauRAWR, see movies with Spankin’ Firecracker, hang with my MLOA buddy Lindsay Lohanded, watch RuPaul’s Drag Race, cuddle with my adorable kitty cats, and spend time with my boyfriend Baker.

Who are your heroes of roller derby?
Bonnie Thunders from Gotham. When she is stuck behind a wall, it’s like she doesn’t even have skates on!

I look up to lots of girls on SVRG. I hope to be able to make a comeback like Bionic BabyDoll after her back surgery. Every time I think about how much it sucks to not be able to skate for 4-6 months, I remember that she couldn’t skate for like two years. Now she’s becoming a beast!

Can you offer any advice to people who are interested in derby?
Don’t be afraid of screwing up. It takes a lot of time, effort, and just plain hard work. Never think that you’ve got something down because you can always improve. Be humble and ask questions. If you just want to be good enough then this isn’t the sport for you.

Canada Rolls through NorCal

The Terminal City Rollergirls made the trek all the way from Vancouver to take on Sacred City, Santa Cruz, and SVRG. Our Dot.Kamikazes played Terminal City’s All-Stars in a WFTDA-sanctioned bout on Sunday, April 29^th at San Jose Skate. This closed bout wasn’t open to the general public, so here’s a recap of the action.

©2012 Nicolas Charest, SVRG’s Belle Wringer helps Catherine Beata Bones get lead jammer status over Terminal City’s Kim Janna

After being held scoreless for two jams, the Dots took the lead in the third jam with Mongoose’s 13-point power jam and held it for 11 jams, when a lead change put Terminal City on top for the duration of the bout.

Terminal City made a total of 6 successful star passes and one failed attempt right off the jammer line over a knee-down start. SVRG also tried this tactic when Absolutely Scabulous passed the panty to Belle Wringer in the final jam of the 1^st period. That’s something that you don’t see too often. As a result, there were a bunch of jams called off before anyone could score and many others where the lead jammer hit-it-and-quit-it as soon as she was able to make her scoring pass.

From the first whistle, we could tell that this was going to be a very physical game. The Canadians brought a level of aggression born of hockey and universal health care. SVRG’s Sasha Degrader, Belle Wringer, Spankin’ Firecracker, and Tennessee Smitan dished out some punishment of their own. Catherine Beata Bones and Pia Mess gave TCRG’s Hittin’ Miss and Luludemon some jammer-on-jammer action. During the 2^nd period, the formidable wall of Sasha Degrader, Smash N’ Burn, and Spankin’ Firecracker held Terminal City’s jammer Kim Janna for an entire lap. But the ladies in black held up some tight defensive walls themselves, and widened the gap on the scoreboard.

©2012 Mark Nockleby, Sasha Degrader extends a hand to give Pia Mess a whip

Pia Mess was the high-scorer for the Dots with 39 points total, 19 of which were earned in the final jam of the game. Belle Wringer and Zootown Throwdown assisted by clearing a path for Pia during that last push power jam.

Terminal City won 179-88, adding to their 116-94 victory against the Santa Cruz Bombshells on Saturday. Quite a comeback after losing Friday’s scrimmage to Sacred City that ended with a hospitalized teammate. We’re happy everyone made it home safely and hope to visit Vancouver someday for a rematch.

Killas Take a Byte out of Sacramento

By Bitch Puddin’

©2012 beakertehmuppet, Juicy’s 15-point Jam!

While SVRG’s Dot.Kamikazes were playing their way through the Dust Devil Tournament in Tucson, the KillaBytes took on the Folsom Prison Bruisers in Sacramento on April 14^th.

The Killas took the lead early on and kept it throughout the entire game. Folsom put up a good fight but SVRG took advantage of their power jams and held Sac City scoreless for a number of jams.

SVRG’s blockers Juicy K. Tore, Jem Jones, and Avida Sane got in more than a couple of brutally effective hits, while jammer Mongoose had no problem getting through Folsom’s pack. It was exciting to see newly rostered KillaBytes Asian Orange, Surge, and Bullet Sucker out on the track. Bullet managed to score 20 points her first time as jammer. Juicy K. Tore and Unleasha Moore were also high-scorers with double-digit jams.

All of SVRG’s skaters took a turn as jammer, and had fun doing it. The KillaBytes went home victorious with a final score of 172-109. This win was dedicated to Mad-Eye Molly who was unable to bout due to an injury. One heartbeat, Killas!

©2012 beakertehmuppet, SVRG’s Culo Whippin’, Surge, and Skirt Vonna-Gut pen Sac City’s jammer Freddie Stare